I was going through something. An uncomfortable feeling I didn't quite want to sit with. So I was doing what I do: moving fast, keeping it together, not quite admitting it even to myself.
My co-worker and best friend Leah pulled me aside.
She said, "Caroline, when we ignore our feelings and push through, it's like sweeping something under the rug. Or hiding clutter before someone comes over. It looks fine from the outside. But you know. Inside, you know it's not quite right."
I sat with that for a minute.
She was right.
We're really good at hiding from ourselves. And I'm not pointing fingers. I'm talking about me too. I do it constantly. Keep moving, look okay, handle it later. But later never really comes, and the clutter just builds.
What actually helps me is creating a moment where I have no choice but to stop. Something sensory. Something that pulls me out of my head and into the room I'm actually in.
For me, right now, that's the Surrender Candle.
I know, that sounds like such a brand thing to say. But I named it Surrender for a reason. Because that's genuinely what it asks of you. Not to fix anything. Just to stop pretending you're fine when you're not, and let yourself actually feel where you are.
Light it. Sit near it. That's the whole practice.
You don't have to have it together. You just have to show up.
That's all I've got for today. Just wanted to share what Leah said, because it's been rattling around in my head in a good way. Maybe it'll inspire something in you today, like it has for me!
With love,
Caroline
Organic Erotic
Shop the Surrender Candle here
Four scents. Santal, Awaken, Sea Salt, Black Velvet.